My outbreak is partially fixed, at least able to maintain.
My depression, controllable.
Though, hatred has gone up another level.
Death wish faded, need to stay alive to make bitches continue hating their lives.
Happy meter went up by 1.
Motivation rise by 1.
Smiles has return to my pathetic face.

It’s been almost a month. I’ve stuck to my healthy diet plan (exercise plan not so). I just don’t eat rice but have everything as usual, more fruits and less oil. And I’m proud to say I’ve loss more than 5kg within this month. 79.9 > 74.5. Scary numbers I know. 4years of feeding destruction and that’s what you get. I’m determine to get back to what I was 4years ago and keep it that way. Giving myself 6months to shed 20 miserable kg’s and I’ll be a happy bunny.

Found something I wanna do & hopefully it’ll work out.

Gonna visit Melbourne soon again, hopefully!
Melbourne = My happy land = My Happy Pills = Super happy me.

Need to blog more often, cause this is the only way I can block out unwanted thoughts.

If paradise exist, this must be it. Can you take me back there? and let time pause forever? I miss those times so dearly and how I wished I never came back.

It scares me how I have nothing to hold on. How hard is it to let go of tons and tons of unhappy thoughts and expectations which I cannot comply? Nothing feels right at this point of time. The taste of paradise lingers in my head and I can’t help but to feel this way.

I’m so tired.

Let us take off to the world where I belong. A place where there’s no worries, no sorrows, only smiles and laughters.

Excited for Aussie trip!! Flying off alone this Saturday night with SQ!

Can’t wait even though I’m a little afraid. Such mixed feelings! haha.

I’m so lost for words o.o

Maybe this will be a mind tripping experience. Hate or love. I’m feeling homesick already though. Haha.