I’m so glad to have you as my friend ♥ …… Please don’t steal my emo queen title, I’ll poke you to death with my super woman strength. So you better smile more!

I love you Mister Korrey Tan and I’ll love you even when my heart stops beating. ♥
(I know it sounds creepy. And it’s meant to be. But yea. You know you love me dada.)

My outbreak is partially fixed, at least able to maintain.
My depression, controllable.
Though, hatred has gone up another level.
Death wish faded, need to stay alive to make bitches continue hating their lives.
Happy meter went up by 1.
Motivation rise by 1.
Smiles has return to my pathetic face.

It’s been almost a month. I’ve stuck to my healthy diet plan (exercise plan not so). I just don’t eat rice but have everything as usual, more fruits and less oil. And I’m proud to say I’ve loss more than 5kg within this month. 79.9 > 74.5. Scary numbers I know. 4years of feeding destruction and that’s what you get. I’m determine to get back to what I was 4years ago and keep it that way. Giving myself 6months to shed 20 miserable kg’s and I’ll be a happy bunny.

Found something I wanna do & hopefully it’ll work out.

Gonna visit Melbourne soon again, hopefully!
Melbourne = My happy land = My Happy Pills = Super happy me.

Need to blog more often, cause this is the only way I can block out unwanted thoughts.

It’s not that I like or am okay with being fat. It’s about each time I think about it, I feel hungry. Sucks to be me. Hohoho.

Okay, seriously, I need somewhere to complain about my unhappy fatty life. Yaya, just shut it with the go exercise shit and the eat less nonsense. I would like to complain about my ridiculous lifestyle and maybe after saying all this, my inner self will wake up and understand that this monster lifestyle is not working out.

#1
Past: I could take straight angle photos without needing to use my hair to cover my face and my face don’t look like it’s gonna explode. (Stop hogging on my simi-flat nose. I like my stupid pig nose. SO WHAT IF I’M IN SELF DENIAL)= Happy times.

Present: Camwhoring has become a difficult task to complete. Straight angle? Don’t even think about it. Putting on more makeup to hide or camouflage only makes things worse. = SAD LIFE.

#2
Past: Online shopping = happy times, I see I buy I wear I can I like. (:

Present: Online Shopping = SAD LIFE, I see, I buy, I can’t wear, I waste money, I HATE. ):

#3
Can’t wear anything in my wardrobe anymore. And I cant wear more than 2 layers. My bra being the first layer. I don’t wear my stockings anymore, not that I don’t like them, it’s because I can’t wear them anymore. It doesn’t stretch enough.

#4
Friend’s classic jaw drop on first sight of seeing me. Wrapping it up with: WTF Happen to you? ARE YOU PREGNANT?
That’s just great. SAD LIFE. I have feelings too you know! BITCH! T-T

#5
Mum sees old picture of me on facebook goes,
Mum: Who’s that pretty girl?
Me: Mother.. THAT’S ME.
Mum: REALLY?!… *slowly looks away to avoid unhappy me*

I could go on and on, but this is way too depressing now.

On a happier note, at least I can eat anything I want and don’t feel that sinful, too fat to care. I can happily enjoy all the delicacies with Boyfriend K, without aftermath complains.

Come to think bout it, alone just being able to eat anything in the world with Boyfriend K is just too blissful already. Oh my, just thinking of his smiley face while eating just makes everything worthwhile. I’m smiling already. In fact, I should really lose weight just for Boyfriend K. Increase my living years to irritate him with a healthy body. He would be a twice as happy smiley face boy if I don’t die of a heart attack due to being too fat. Yap! I shall do it! Kk. Happy now.

New motto: Healthy life = More food. (healthy life equals more years ahead to try more food.)

I think this post just became pointless.